Location: In the village of Sithney, near the church, west of Helston.
www: (Er, I don't think so. It just wouldn't seem right.)
Plus Points: Huge, monster slices of delicious, low priced homemade cake.
Minus Points: No bacon butties - if that's what you're after.
Signature dish: Carrot cake. Lemon sponge. Cornish scones. No, ignore that -
everything is equally wonderful.
In summary: As perfect a tea room as you'll ever find with delightful and
entertaining hosts 'auntie' Gill and Trevor. There is also a bit of a garden,
with a large model railway no less, and they love cyclists (Auntie Gill's 'boys').
When it comes to tea and cake, this is the Falmouth Wheelers' spiritual home.
Please note: The 'rubenesque' lady on the bicycle is a satisfied customer - not auntie Gill!
Camelot RestaurantLocation: Near the zebra crossing, Mitchell's Corner, Perranporth.
www: No website that we know of.
Plus Points: Good cheap food, from cakes to roast lunch.
Minus Points: Holiday makers have the presumption to think that they should be able to use the place during the summer as well as us cyclists.
Signature dish: We reckon it's the £3.99 'all day breakfast' (including cup of tea.)
In summary: Fast, friendly service and everything is underpriced -
but please don't tell the nice owner. Just leave a nice big tip.
Roskilly's
Location: In the middle of nowhere, near St Kevern, down on the Lizard.
Plus Points: Food good and varied, some quite sophisticated. Very good outside seating area. Cheeky, friendly staff. Old tractors are available to play on, which, embarrassingly,
has proved to be popular with some of the older Falmouth Wheelers.
Minus Points: Sometimes it's heaving with coach trip holiday makers in the summer.
Signature dish: Homemade soup, giant prawn baguettes (and fancy salads if you're that way inclined). And of course Roskilly's ice cream. And they do baked beans on toast too.
In summary: Can be a tad expensive but it's a firm favourite with the Falmouth Wheelers. It's a very good stop for cyclists with plenty of space and seating.
Bissoe Bike Hire CafeLocation: Bissoe Valley, near the village of Devoran, near Truro.
Plus Points: Off the road next to an excellent off-road cycle track. Seats outside as well as inside. Built for cyclists! A vast menu.
Minus Points: Very slippery trays.
Signature dish: E xcellent bacon rolls (could be the best in Cornwall?)coffee, soup and toasted teacakes.
In summary: Friendly service, a good location and with nearly every customer a cyclist,
you've got to patronise it!
The Station House
Location: Long Rock beach car park, by the railway bridge, west of Marazion.
www: I really don't think so.
Plus Points: Superb and varied baguettes. Good coffee. Near the beach.
Minus Points: No indoor seating. And again, flippin' holiday makers think they can just come down here and use our cafes willy-nilly in the summer, causing us cyclists to queue.
Signature dish: Egg and bacon wholemeal bread baguette.
In summary: A Falmouth Wheelers' regular fuelling post and a favourite with motorcyclists as well. Just make sure that when your order is shouted out that someone else doesn't grab it and eat it before you can. Heh, Jonathan?
The Grange Fruit FarmLocation: Climb out of Gweek southwards and it's at the top of the hill on the right.
Plus Points: Wide range of good food. Plenty of space indoors and out.
Minus Points: Other customers. (It's popular.)
Signature dish: Proper meals like roast lunches and fruit based things like strawberries and cream. Cake is good too.
In summary: A long time favourite with the Falmouth Wheelers. There's something for everyone plus superb inside and outside seating plus a very big car park, so you could start a ride from here too.
Trebah Gardens Location: Just along from Mawnan Smith towards the Budock Vean Hotel.
Plus Points: Great location. Nice building.
Minus Points: Service sometimes a bit slow due to people who've come to tour the garden and then have the audacity to order tea, cakes and meals, thereby holding up us cyclists, yet again.
Signature dish: Cream tea.
In summary: Popular spot with the Falmouth Wheelers 10 o'clockers. Plenty of space.
The Jam PotLocation: Over looking the sea and nestling amongst sand dunes at Gwithian Towans
Plus Points: Good breakfasts, superb location, good service.
Minus points: It must be the smallest cafe in the UK so if it's a dodgy weather day then there's only room for a few people indoors.
Signature dish: Full English
In summary: A wonderful location and quite unique. Look at this Starbucks, Little Chef and CostaLot Coffee and weep.
Wave Crest CafeLocation: Literally on the edge of the cliff at Lizard Point.
www: None found.
Plus Points: Great location. Good size portions. Good coffee.
Minus points: Very busy in summer. Quite pricey. Limited menu.
Signature dish: Superb homemade soup and huge chunks of wholemeal bread.
In summary: There's not many views as good as this but it gets very busy in the summer. Good cake as well as savouries.
Cornish CamelsLocation: Somewhere in the middle of nowhere on the Lizard.
Plus Points: Lots of room, good organic food and coffee. And camels to look at.
Minus points: Bit pricey. Not very, just a bit.
Signature dish: Excellent homemade cake.
In summary: Very friendly staff and a bit different from your average cafe.
Millensy MillLocation: Somewhere in the middle of nowhere on the Roseland.
Plus Points: Amazing setting in a beautiful valley. Sit next to the mill pond.
Minus points: Hills from hell either side of the mill. Tricky after a cream tea or two.
Signature dish: Delicious homemade scones.
In summary: A medievel mill, now a great cafe, located in one of the most picturesque areas of Cornwall.
Len's CafeLocation: Under the seafront car park Portreath. (Okay, so it's not the Ritz.)
www: What on earth would be the point?
Plus points: Only the biggest and best egg and bacon baps in the whole of Christendom!
Minus points: No indoors and not exactly a 'stylish' culinary destination.
Signature dish: Egg and bacon roll, funnily enough.
In summary: Whilst Rick Stein and Jamie Oliver won't be worrying, if all you want is a proper mug of tea and some fine greasy spoon breakfast whilst soaking up the rays and overlooking a big surfing beach for under a fiver, this is the place for you.
Stithians Reservoir Watersports Centre CafeLocation: Middle of Cornwall, next to Stithians Reservoir (what a surprise).
Plus points: Nice location over looking the reservoir. Good indoors and outdoors seating.
Minus points: Pretty windy sometimes. Expensive. Queuing with soggy windsurfers.
Signature dish: Proper homemade cake.
In summary: Well away from the road. Friendly. Good coffee. The cafe lacks the character of other Wheelers' favourites but it is only a couple of years old. Favoured by our Sunday 10 o'clockers.
Choak's PastiesLocation: 30 Killigrew Street, Falmouth
www: Lord no.
Plus points: Pasties. Pasties. Pasties.
Minus points: 1. They're not availaible in every town, village, shopping mall, train station and pub throughout the world. 2. Choak's is not open 24/7 3. Nonsensical variations (veggie, chicken) are beginning to take up valuable oven space.
Signature dish: Would you believe it? It's pasties.
In summary: As anyone who has ever had the unadulterated pleasure of experiencing a 'Choak's' knows, they have to be the best pasties in the world. The pastry is always perfect, the filling consistant and the sizes on offer are just right. A 'large' will keep a working man going all day, a 'medium' is a good size for the ladies and if you're on one of those fancy health diets you can buy a 'small'. Also, the 'cocktails' are great for party nibbles or children. There is an 'extra large' but I've only seen that attempted once - by a callow youth showing off to a bunch of maids on Prince of Wales pier. He ended up looking a fool.
True, there are a few other good pasty makers about but they can't make a pasty that comes close to the culinary genius, the gastronomical gorgeousness that is a Choak's pasty. (You may deduce from this restrained report that they are quite popular with the Falmouth Wheelers.)
Horse & Jockey Bakery (Pasties)Location: 41 Meneage Street, Helston and 1 Jerboa Cottages, Porthleven
www:
Plus points: ( This bakery has had several recommendations and the website is awaiting a first hand report.)
Minus points:
Signature dish:
In summary:
Patisserie Martin Location: 24 Place de Otages, Morlaix, France
www. Que? Non.
Plus points: Exquisite, perfect cakes, pastries, truffles and mousses of various sizes, good coffee (and tea) as well as charming service.
Minus points: Just one small thing. You'll have to catch a ferry across the English Channel to get there.
Signature dish: Everything is gorgeous.
In summary: The Falmouth Wheelers' very own French 'Auntie Gill's' (see above). There must be a better patisserie, but you could spend a lifetime looking for it.
Porthminster Beach Cafe
Location: Porthminster Beach, St Ives.
www. No.
Plus points: Good food with sandwiches made to order. Very, very cheap!
Minus points: Hoards of beach-goers in the summer. (Mind you, the view can be nice on a hot sunny day.)
Signature dish: Probably the baguettes but the pasties are good too.
In summary: A big menu, good quality food and drink and low prices make this a 'must visit' for the wheelers when visiting the north coast.
Harbourside Diner
Location: Portreath
www. No.
Plus points: Good food, nice coffee and hot chocolate at reasonable prices.
Minus points: You have to fight your way past non-wheelers because it's so popular.
Signature dish: Cookies and chicken wraps.
In summary: An American style-diner with friendly staff some of which "like a good laugh", a relaxed atmosphere, outside tables and even bike racks make this a great cyclists' stop. So that's 2 good stops in Portreath now.
Little Pengelly Farm
Location: Trenwheal, off the B3302 from Helston to Hayle. (Best look at the multimap link below.)
Multimap: click here Note: This isn't 100% accurate but it's within 100m.
Plus points: Lovely setting and friendly service.
Minus points: Possible to scoot past. Keep your eyes open!
Signature dish: Flapjacks. But we haven't tried everything yet.
In summary: A charming stop. And they are friends of cyclists.
Avalon
Location: Porthtowan
www. No.
Plus points: Avalon impressed Red Leader and KK whilst they were on their Kernow Tour.
Minus points: I'm guessing it'll be a tad busy in the height of summer. If we ever get another summer that is...
Signature dish: To be updated soon - but knowing Red Leader they probably do nice beans on toast.
In summary: If KK and Red Leader liked it it's good enough for me. Those guys know a thing or two about cafes.
We could easily witter on and on about the benefits of good nutrition and the importance that highly-tuned cyclists give to eating healthy food, or we could list our favourite cake and breakfast stops and why we enjoy visiting them. So, in the culinary tradition of the Falmouth Wheelers, 
here they are laid before you, for you to feast upon. Agree or disagree? Or maybe you know of some other worthy establishments? Email us your thoughts. 
Auntie Gill's
Hell's Mouth Cafe
The Waymarker
