Ride report 5th April 2023
The experiment a couple of weeks ago of creating an AI-generated ride report using ChatGPT provoked a totally underwhelming response, so it has been decided to revert to using the tried and tested NS (Natural Stupidity) platform instead. See if you can spot the difference.
Who said you can’t teach old dogs new tricks? Last week saw the breath-taking innovation of a trial of using a new gathering point for the OGILs. Instead of the usual telephone box (RIP) at Union Corner, it had been democratically decided at the last club meeting to run a trial of meeting at the path off Bickland Water Road that leads to Budock Church instead. This was to avoid holding up and potentially annoying following traffic on Hillhead Road, and avoiding crossing the lethal Argal crossroads, the site of many a near miss, and also some non-misses. Surprisingly, this change of meeting place didn’t create any problems for the gaggle of OGILs that congregated at Church Walk (we need to give it a name). Our excitement was tempered slightly when Kath warned us not to get complacent on two accounts. First, the relative calm of the meeting point was only so because it was the school holidays. Once the schools were back, the area would be clogged with traffic dropping the little ones off at St Francis across the road. Second, the descent into Budock Water which we are used to having to ourselves for a high speed swoop is only like that on Sundays, and we are likely to be in for a shock when we encounter the traffic on a weekday. So off we went, a little hesitatingly, past Budock Church and made the left to head down the hill. As it happened, I think we saw one car and a pedestrian as we rode through the village. Still, better forewarned than not.
We carried on through No-Man’s Land up to the Argal crossroads, turned left and so on to The Other Place, where we managed to block half the road in customary style while we chatted and tried to decide on a destination. Our Illustrious Chairman declared that the Milk Barn Cafe at Mullion would do nicely. Some of us were keen to get back before the rain arrived as forecast at 1pm, but our IC declared that we would be back by 12.30. Even though it was obvious that to make that return time we would only be able to stop for 10 minutes and would have to average 20mph, we nevertheless felt re-assured and nothing more was said. We set off, all that is except for Kath who announced that she only came out to experience the new meeting point, and headed home. Some of us are easily pleased.
The route taken was the usual – Gweek, Mawgan-in-Meneage, Trelowarren and Goonhilly Downs. This last section was ridden at a reasonably sedate pace considering it seems to be the unofficial club team time trial course, so we arrived at Mullion in a slightly less ragged state than we normally do. We settled in to the cafe and ordered our food and drinks, which mostly appeared reasonably promptly and correctly. We received an apology but no explanation for the use of micro-saucers which gave the table a feeling of the Mad Hatter’s Tea Party, even without accounting for the individuals seated around it. Unusually, politics did not seem to feature prominently in the discussion, which mainly centred around the forthcoming adventures down the Danube and in Ireland. As we enjoyed our break, we were invaded by the other Wednesday ride – was that a coincidence or were they stalking us? This meant that the cafe was more or less taken over by Wheelers – mysteriously the other customers melted away.
All too soon it was time to depart, and we girded our loins in preparation for the ascent out of Poldhu Cove. This was negotiated by everyone without incident. Our route home was again along the usual lines. There was some excitement at Cury (Nantithet) at the bottom of Gylly Hill where the ford was in full spate and some of us without overshoes got wet feet. But we carried on regardless to Helston and then down Muddy Lane, which was surprisingly un-muddy considering. On reaching the A394 we broke into small groups to negotiate the main road to the Retanna lay-by. The ability of the groups to cohere was somewhat mixed, and the number and size of the groups that arrived was greater and smaller respectively than had originally set off. From there we rode to Crane Garage, where some us elected to avoid the right turn off the main road to Halvasso and instead continue through Longdowns and then head to the Donkey Sanctuary. From there we could enjoy the fantastic swoop past Argal reservoir before taking the left past Argal Home Farm to cut off the crossroads corner, and thence home.
A conventional but nevertheless entertaining morning’s ride. About 74 km for me.